Trapped on 3rd shift!

[Desolo]

Well, here I am stuck at behind a counter at work til 6AM tommorrow. This sucks ass.
I remember when staying up all night was something fun you did, rather then a chore you didn't really want to do. Rather then being on a diablo binge or fallout binge, or ultra late pen'n'paper marathon or just staying up late watching movies or surfing the net, it was just getting more time out of the day.

Now its just time I could be sleeping. Sometimes I worry that I'm finaly getting to that dreaded part of life some would call adulthood? Or maybe I'm just tired of my job going sideways.

Goddamn it makes me feel old, and I shouldn't . *sigh*

[BlueCross]

Sometimes I worry that I'm finaly getting to that dreaded part of life some would call adulthood?

[sidebar]
I don't really remember making a transition from childhood to adulthood.  But I do not think I was born directly into adulthood nor do I think I never transited from childhood.

Rather...

Something else.

Perhaps adulthood crept up on me so slowly that I never knew when it happened.  Or perhaps I don't make a distinction between the two.

I see kids having the same levels of problems and sadness and frustration that 'older' folks do.  Sure, they may seem minor to us but to the kid, the problems are real and the problems are big; no different than we see our problems, I believe.

Or perhaps it is all explained by the fact that my head went through the windshield of our 63 Volkswagen when I was a junior in college.

[Desolo]

Well, having ones head put through a windshield may in fact be one of those things that could affect ones outlook on the world, right?

Perhaps even being able to ask the question of "Have I become a grownup yet?" Is in fact an indicator that one ISN'T? If so maybe I should count myself lucky?

[BlueCross]

Perhaps even being able to ask the question of "Have I become a grownup yet?" Is in fact an indicator that one ISN'T?

See... to me that isn't even a valid question.  There's some sort of implication in the question that says "Yeh, now I have finally arrived and can make choices in my life that are reasonable instead of foolish."  I don't believe that there is an arrival point; rather, there is constant change in your life where you might make different decisions now that you might have made earlier.  But the whole concept of 'growing up' sort of demeans or trivializes the younger part of your life.

It's very difficult for me to articulate this concept but it is something I have always believed; it's probably one reason why I get along so well with coaching kids.  I don't talk down to them, I try to meet them on their own terms and generally don't treat them any different than I treat most adults.

So the 'solution' for me when asking the question "have I grown up yet" (or something equivalent) is to not ask the question because the question is somewhat meaningless.

Anyway, that's just me. Your mileage may vary.

[KMD]

I know you're not asking for advice but I feel like giving it anyway; You're a smart guy, don't feel like you have to suffer through crappy job shifts for the sake of being an adult. Do what you really want, because thats not the impression i'm getting. Life is too short to be unhappy.

And I agree with BC's view of adulthood. I don't think its a single moment where you say "I can finally make big boy decisions", but instead a culmination of life experiences that teach you to approach problems in a mature way without realizing it. Sort of like when you become good at a sport, you don't have to think about about how to move or act, because being adept just becomes a part of you.

 I've always felt that, in a societal sense,  knowing when you're "an adult" is harder for a man than a woman. Whereas women can birth children, for men this point of maturation is more blurry. We've also still got the expectations of being major providers in a family. This is something that I think has frustrated men for eons.

[Desolo]

Sounds like your conception of that idea fits along the lines I think of time...in the end its all an artifical framework put around the truth of a thing we cannot express in its entirety.

I like the idea of just not asking the question.... If asking it cheapens the whole concept, why do it?
 Interesting thoughts.

Its not so much I feel I have to suffer a crappy job.... its that I do seem to get tired of being one of the people that ends up "fixing" things because the rest of the situation goes sideways. I do it for the people I work with that actually merit it, but it gets tiring. I really should find something else but I'm just not quite sure what I really want to do. Its a complicated situation.

Something about being up late at night for no "good" reason and alone for long stretches makes me start getting all existensal I guess. Thanks for the thoughts folks.... its interesting to get some outside insight into such a fluid concept.

I certainly feel better after getting some actual sleep

[AcdQueen89]

I've always felt that, in a societal sense,  knowing when you're "an adult" is harder for a man than a woman. Whereas women can birth children, for men this point of maturation is more blurry.

...in a physical sense, yes. But that seems to validate the sexualization of younger and younger girls in the media. Just because you menstruate does not mean your ready for sex. To me, sex is something acceptable after you reach the maturity to understand that life is more than a game. For some people that doesnt happen until well into their twenties. I'll agree that women tend to mature quicker than men, but it isnt the solid line you seem to be stating.

We've also still got the expectations of being major providers in a family. This is something that I think has frustrated men for eons.

I'm not sure about the eons, but I feel that you have it spot on. I think that the role of men in modern western society is under studied, especially when you look at the all important breaking news about Miley Cyrus in her underwear

[Jester]

One of the ways to tell if you an adult is if some one says its nap time and it sounds like a good idea. Also one can be an adult at any point in life, to be an adult is to step up and do what needs to be done. But I'll leave it to those with more life experience  .

[Desolo]

everyone should be able to enjoy naps, just as a rule....

[TK]

More than anything else having a family, a mortgage and more to care about than beer and computer games has marked my transition into adulthood. When I looked into my sons eyes for the first time I realised I had been given a monumental gift I needed to prove I was worthy of that tends to change your outlook on life a touch.

It also comes with the realisation that life can't all be serious and that each moment can't be lived as an 'adult'; having the ability to revel in simple revelations is a hugely important part of walking the path with your children.

I'm sure the catalyst is different for everyone and in very real ways I'm still growing in to being an adult and I intend to be till the day I die, even though I like my life now I'd hate to think the way I am right now is all I'll ever be.

[Desolo]

For a thread started during a late night shift, feeling down, there is a lot of very interesting thought here.... I'm happy to have the privalage of reading it.