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« on: October 12, 2020, 09:46:23 AM »
I think it would be:
Mother: As a parent myself I can't reconcile how your actions put me in harms way against your assertion that you had no idea what was happening, what the hell were you thinking?
Dad: Where were you? I can count the days I've spent with you on one hand, can you tell me why and who you were?
I grew apart from my mother when I noticed a growing disparity in how I approach being a parent and the things that happened in my childhood, she was emotionally abusive in her own right and, from the perspective of being an adult with three children, so neglectful in a very focussed way that she allowed life altering things to happen to me I'd never imagine a reasonable person would allow. I genuinely border on thinking she had full knowledge and either allowed it to perpetuate because of the natural benefit or because she gained direct benefit from it. She tried to stick herself too far in to the running of my own family so I've not spoken to her for nearly 10 years apart from when she called to tell me of a death in the family and tried to use that as a means to get back in to our live.
My father is Mr radio silence, I remember a handful of days with him when I was younger, he split from my mother before I was born, made an effort to see me born then had a very arms length relationship with me, found me moderately interesting when I got old enough to drink, made an appearance at my wedding then soon after had a tantrum when he couldn't come on a particular Sunday, that was soon after the wedding and I've been married 11 years and I have occasionally tried to reach out to him but... nothing.
I'm occasionally struck with sorrow for myself and that fact that my children don't have grandparents but I genuinely think they're better out of our lives but I'd still wish them well and hope that they find peace from whatever made them deeply flawed individuals.